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	<title>plain english ASIA</title>
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	<link>http://www.betterbusinesswriting.asia</link>
	<description>Clear writing for modern, customer-oriented professionals</description>
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		<title>Do you enjoy a elastic living?</title>
		<link>http://www.betterbusinesswriting.asia/?p=413</link>
		<comments>http://www.betterbusinesswriting.asia/?p=413#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Mon, 06 Sep 2010 03:46:40 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Ruth</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Uncategorized]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.betterbusinesswriting.asia/?p=413</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Say what? The tagline for Hopewell Real Estate Agency Ltd's newish development in Wan Chai is:


<blockquote>the Easiest Way to Enjoy a Elastic Living</blockquote>]]></description>
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		<title>Extreme document makeover &#8211; Citibank</title>
		<link>http://www.betterbusinesswriting.asia/?p=398</link>
		<comments>http://www.betterbusinesswriting.asia/?p=398#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 03 Sep 2010 04:56:58 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Ruth</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Uncategorized]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.betterbusinesswriting.asia/?p=398</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[
			
				
			
		
A very standard letter. Very unprofessional.
Here it is:

With comments:

And the rewrite:
Dear Ms Customer
Thank you for your application to authorize a direct debit.
It usually takes about one month to process this application. When it is approved, we’ll write to you to confirm the effective date. Until then, please settle your account by check.
If you have any [...]]]></description>
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		<title>Extreme document makeover: Wing Hang Bank</title>
		<link>http://www.betterbusinesswriting.asia/?p=348</link>
		<comments>http://www.betterbusinesswriting.asia/?p=348#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 19 May 2010 02:42:10 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Ruth</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Finance]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[plain English]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[credit]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[wing hang bank]]></category>

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		<description><![CDATA[I received a letter from Wing Hang Credit recently, with whom I have a mortgage. It took four people and considerable discussion to agree on what we thought the company was trying to say - including two who referred to the Chinese version and found it equally unhelpful]]></description>
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		<item>
		<title>Extreme makeover: Sick of HR policies?</title>
		<link>http://www.betterbusinesswriting.asia/?p=329</link>
		<comments>http://www.betterbusinesswriting.asia/?p=329#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 11 May 2010 08:31:24 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Ruth</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Uncategorized]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[plain English]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[HR]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[policies]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[policy]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[sick leave]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.betterbusinesswriting.asia/?p=329</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[
			
				
			
		
Recently spotted on a web page of an HR department:
A medical certificate from a registered medical practitioner/registered Chinese medicine practitioner/registered dentist specifying the period of sick leave as well as the nature of sickness or injury is required to support a sick leave application.  As a concession, sick leave not exceeding two days may be granted [...]]]></description>
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		<item>
		<title>House Passes Braley Plain Language Act</title>
		<link>http://www.betterbusinesswriting.asia/?p=317</link>
		<comments>http://www.betterbusinesswriting.asia/?p=317#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 30 Mar 2010 01:53:15 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Ruth</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[plain English]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.betterbusinesswriting.asia/?p=317</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[
			
				
			
		

Bill Would Require Government to Write Tax Forms, Other Documents in Easy-to-Understand, Simple Language
FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE
March 18, 2010
Washington, DC &#8211; As part of Sunshine Week, the House today passed Rep. Bruce Braley&#8217;s (D-Iowa) Plain Language Act (HR 946), which will require the federal government to write documents, such as tax returns, federal college aid applications, [...]]]></description>
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		<title>Alan Siegel: Let&#8217;s simplify legal jargon!</title>
		<link>http://www.betterbusinesswriting.asia/?p=309</link>
		<comments>http://www.betterbusinesswriting.asia/?p=309#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 26 Mar 2010 10:47:13 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Ruth</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Finance]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Government]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[plain English]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[writing]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Alan seigel]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[credit card agreement]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[HSBC]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.betterbusinesswriting.asia/?p=309</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Branding expert and one of the leading authorities on business  communication, Alan Siegel, talked at TED in February on the topic of plain English.

Like us, he wants to put plain English into legal  documents for government and business.]]></description>
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		<item>
		<title>Starbucks: insincere, impersonal and disappointing?</title>
		<link>http://www.betterbusinesswriting.asia/?p=266</link>
		<comments>http://www.betterbusinesswriting.asia/?p=266#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 26 Mar 2010 02:25:04 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Ruth</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[plain English]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[customer communication]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[starbucks]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.betterbusinesswriting.asia/?p=266</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[
			
				
			
		
I had cause to write to Starbucks recently. Not to complain; simply to ask a question. My question was about payment methods. In Hong Kong, in addition to the usual methods, some Starbucks outlets accept Octopus. Octopus is a brilliantly convenient common stored value card. Trouble is: some Starbucks outlets accept it; some don&#8217;t. I [...]]]></description>
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		<item>
		<title>Do your vision/mission statements suck? Most do!</title>
		<link>http://www.betterbusinesswriting.asia/?p=247</link>
		<comments>http://www.betterbusinesswriting.asia/?p=247#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 12 Mar 2010 04:37:08 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Ruth</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[plain English]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[writing]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[made to stick]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[mission statement]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[vision statement]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.betterbusinesswriting.asia/?p=247</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[
			
				
			
		
I recently was asked to teach a group of students to write a business plan.
While pulling together the material, I came across dozens of mission statements that suck.
For example, from Bank of China:
 
Our Vision is:
To be customer’s premier bank
Our Mission is to:
Build customer satisfaction and provide quality and professional service
Offer rewarding career opportunities and cultivate staff [...]]]></description>
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		<item>
		<title>Juicy user manual from Mophie</title>
		<link>http://www.betterbusinesswriting.asia/?p=240</link>
		<comments>http://www.betterbusinesswriting.asia/?p=240#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 09 Feb 2010 07:36:40 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Ruth</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Marketing]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[plain English]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[juice pack air]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[mophie]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[user manual]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.betterbusinesswriting.asia/?p=240</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[
			
				
			
		
It&#8217;s not often that I read user manuals. Most are beyond awful. So, imagine my suprise (and joy) when read the user manual for my new, sexy Mophie Juice Pack Air.



mophie juice pack air


Here&#8217;s an extract:
Here’s a rundown of why the juice pack air™ is so fantastic:
1. (Take a breath) Ergonomic, form-fitting, fully protective impact-resistant [...]]]></description>
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		<item>
		<title>Ocean Park: Sentence construction (update)</title>
		<link>http://www.betterbusinesswriting.asia/?p=221</link>
		<comments>http://www.betterbusinesswriting.asia/?p=221#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Thu, 28 Jan 2010 08:14:57 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Ruth</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Marketing]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[plain English]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[writing]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.betterbusinesswriting.asia/?p=221</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[
			
				
			
		
Back in November 2009, we blogged about Ocean Park&#8217;s new website.
It appears someone took notice and, bless them, made our suggested corrections.
Here&#8217;s the original that we criticised:
And as it appears today:



Ocean Park staffers &#8211; you&#8217;ve missed the point. Any idiot can make corrections as suggested by a language expert. However, huge chunks of text appearing [...]]]></description>
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